My in-laws are in town this weekend and last night there was a discussion about my husband applying for his British passport--as his father was born in England and later moved to the Southern Hemisphere. My mother-in-law was sure to mention at the end of the discussion, "don't forget you are Australian first and foremost." My mother has told me something similar saying that no matter where I go, "just remember you are always American. Don't give that up." Not that I would surrender my American citizenship, but it has caused my mother some unnecessary worry.
But all that talk about identity in terms of country got me thinking. What on earth is going to happen to my children? If my husband must always be Australian first and I must always be American first, then what do our children have to be first? It would certainly cause an identity crisis if we expected them to be both at all times. And when did our identity have to be so tied in with our citizenship? Does where we come from completely dictate who we are? Can we only be from one country? Perhaps, we are only born in one country, but is it perhaps our more recent memories and experience that change that?
However, I wouldn't consider myself Australian. I don't know if I even truly consider myself American anymore. I haven't been in the country for nearly two years. A lot can change in two years--including myself. And I don't know if I could completely relate the same way I used to. So, I guess I'm an outsider. Does it mean I have lost my identity too?
And in a globalised world, why are we so concerned with tying identity to country anyways? We've melded so much culture together that we're all living with second hand traditions borrowed from other countries anyways. So why are we so concerned with defining ourselves by imaginary lines anyways?
My husband told me this morning on the tram that our children will be "citizens of the world." But they still have to live somewhere. Do we battle it out to see if we raise them in Australia or the States or do we find neutral ground in a place like the UK? Does it even matter? It probably matters greatly to our parents, where one of them will have to miss out more than the other if we pick one of our birth countries. But then is it fair to make them both miss out? Is it even possible to split our time 50/50 between countries. Unless I win the lottery, I think not.
But then again, does it really matter? Can't it all work out? Won't our children's identities in the be determined by how we shape them? Not just where on the world map they live? But my husband cannot identify as British. He has never lived there. But does that mean that there isn't some part of him, of his history and family identity that is British doesn't count? Maybe it really does come down to where you live now, not just where your family comes from or where you go.
But I'd like to think that those things matter. I believe that my identity is more than my passport.
